Evil Vint Cerf wants to become god, so he develops a cunning plan:
Evil Vint Cerf wants to become god, so he develops a cunning plan:
However, Evil Vint Cerf discovers that thereâs already a kind of hive intelligence embedded in the communication between people in the form of collective expectations â the Internet Ghost.
Internet Ghost is our protagonist.
So, Evil Vint Cerf modifies his cunning plan.
He genetically engineers a baby & ages it up to pubery, and makes it channel Internet Ghost all the time. Then, he steals Internet Ghostâs handle to post under. Meanwhile, Internet Ghost is being brainwashed by drugs & a fake family led by Evil Vint Cerfâs work-wife.
Evil Vint Cerfâs work wife is OK with this plan because it gives him an excuse to brainwash a girl he likes into believing sheâs married to him. Whenever they arenât doing a bored-high-school-english-class line-reading of a âfamily memberâ script, theyâre downstairs necking on the couch.
Thereâs another problem:
Apple PARC has given two rentacops experimental wearable computers and sent them to investigate!
Luckily, Evil Vint Cerf has already by this point gained complete control over Masonic 4Chan, & uses them to do his bidding.
Unfortunately, this plan begins to fall apart.
Evil Vint Cerfâs work wife gives Internet Ghost a good computer because Internet Ghost, being a manifestation of the abstract concept of communication, is inexplicably persuasive and charismatic whenever she talks to people who like computers.
Then, when a loserâs nootropic-induced telepathy causes him to shoot up a nightclub, the resulting delayed bedtime causes Internet Ghost to realize, for the first time, that her âfamilyâ is only around during mealtimes & actually sleeps somewhere else.
Later on, Apple PARC kidnaps her & reminds her that she doesnât know her own birthday either.
Anyway, this all comes to a head when Internet Ghostâs crush on her only non- bitchy friend from school directly conflicts with the whole peopleâs-thoughts- being-projected thing (in the form of her crushâs masturbatory fantasy about a teacher being broadcast on the internet) which causes Internet Ghost to directly confront and defeat Evil Vint Cerf, who briefly becomes a bleeding testicle with arms.
She doesnât actually fix the problem, but instead runs a very accurate simulation of a physical reality on imagination, so that everybody thinks theyâre living in a world not built on telepathic group hallucination. In order to do this, she needs to stop being a player character.
By John Ohno on February 3, 2019.
[Canonical link](https://medium.com/@enkiv2/a-slightly-sarcastic-serial- experiments-lain-plot-synopsis-86f858e35d79)
Exported from Medium on September 18, 2020.
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